Tips to Support your Pregnant Teenage Daughter
No matter how young or old your child is, they are always your child. So finding out your daughter might be in a complicated situation with a pregnancy is overwhelming. Maybe you worry not only for for your child directly, or about the pregnancy, the baby involved, or all three (and a million other things now complicated by this new reality). It is important to recognize that this time in your families life is huge, and life altering. Here are a few tips on how to support them through this process.
1. Be Kind. Your pregnant child most likely did not intentionally plan to become pregnant. Your feelings of shock, disappointment, fear and nervousness are the same feelings everyone experiences; but it is important to support your pregnant daughter and show your love and support. She needs you now more than ever. So be considerate to how she is feeling, what she is thinking and listen to her.
2. Help her investigate her options. Keeping and raising a baby, placing a child for adoption or having an abortion are all options that will permanently change the lives of those involved, especially her. Help her learn the pros and cons of each option. Encourage your child to think about not just the immediate repercussions of her decision, but long term outcomes as well. Prepare her for the reality of these decisions, not just the 'romantic' ideals associated with some of them.
3. Consider the other parties involved. Who is the father? Is he kind to her? Can he step up to the realities of what has happened? How does his family feel? Guiding a pregnant teenager to make good decisions is hard, but these decisions affect not only her, but the father as well. He should be informed, and his opinions considered.
4. Health Care! Taking care of oneself while pregnant is vital for the health of not only the mother, but the child as well. Encourage healthy living. Make sure she visits her doctor and has all the information required to inform her of her responsibilities during her pregnancy to maintain her and her baby's health.
5. Prepare her for the outcome of her decision. If your daughter has chosen to raise her child, prepare her for what to expect as a parent. Encourage her to face the realities of all that parenting entails. If she has chosen to have an abortion, look into counselling for her, or find a website that deals with post abortion issues. If your child has decided to place her child for adoption, read up on adoption. Find her some blogs (available here) from both birth parents and adoptive parents, or look around and see if you know anyone who has gone through this before who might be of help. Regardless of what your daughter decides...it is time to step up and show her what being a good parent means.
1. Be Kind. Your pregnant child most likely did not intentionally plan to become pregnant. Your feelings of shock, disappointment, fear and nervousness are the same feelings everyone experiences; but it is important to support your pregnant daughter and show your love and support. She needs you now more than ever. So be considerate to how she is feeling, what she is thinking and listen to her.
2. Help her investigate her options. Keeping and raising a baby, placing a child for adoption or having an abortion are all options that will permanently change the lives of those involved, especially her. Help her learn the pros and cons of each option. Encourage your child to think about not just the immediate repercussions of her decision, but long term outcomes as well. Prepare her for the reality of these decisions, not just the 'romantic' ideals associated with some of them.
3. Consider the other parties involved. Who is the father? Is he kind to her? Can he step up to the realities of what has happened? How does his family feel? Guiding a pregnant teenager to make good decisions is hard, but these decisions affect not only her, but the father as well. He should be informed, and his opinions considered.
4. Health Care! Taking care of oneself while pregnant is vital for the health of not only the mother, but the child as well. Encourage healthy living. Make sure she visits her doctor and has all the information required to inform her of her responsibilities during her pregnancy to maintain her and her baby's health.
5. Prepare her for the outcome of her decision. If your daughter has chosen to raise her child, prepare her for what to expect as a parent. Encourage her to face the realities of all that parenting entails. If she has chosen to have an abortion, look into counselling for her, or find a website that deals with post abortion issues. If your child has decided to place her child for adoption, read up on adoption. Find her some blogs (available here) from both birth parents and adoptive parents, or look around and see if you know anyone who has gone through this before who might be of help. Regardless of what your daughter decides...it is time to step up and show her what being a good parent means.